Tuesday, May 13, 2008

More Love Less Fighting

It has been a rough couple of weeks in the Wilcox household. The kids are being just miserable mean to each other. I feel like sometimes I can barely make it to the end of the day. Bedtime, even though it in itself is not a painless event, really is all I have to look forward to once the kids get home from school. All I can think about is how I am going to make it through the summer when they are home together all the time. From 4:00 to 8:00 all I hear it seams is crying, yelling and tattling.

Then of course there are the doubts that come when your children aren't living up to your hopes and expectations. Am I a bad Mom? Have I somehow taught them to yell, name call and fight? Why do they do such mean things to each other? All the secret manipulation to make each other mad...

Today I feel pretty miserable. I think of the children in some of my friends families and all I can do is compare. Their children love each other... I never see their children fight... I've never seen their children be impolite with company...

So sad that this "Mother's Day" week, I really don't feel too happy about being a Mom. Sigh...

9 comments:

The Roberts' Report said...

Jen you are so beautiful! That pic on the top of the blog of the family...you are just the way I remember you back in High School. gosh you haven't changed a bit! And I bet you are still the super sweet, extremely smart, well read, happy, out going, loving person. Don't worry about the kids. Sometimes when Larry comes home I just smile and tell him he should be happy that the kids are fed and still alive. ;)
Maybe it's time for a little FHE topic on family unity or contention!?!

The Seaquist Family said...

ok, you need to feel better? Come on over to my house. You'll not only get to see the kids screaming and yelling (on occasion you'll get to see the same from me-sad to admit). I have those same thoughts every night when I get into bed. Why do they keep hitting one another? Why are they pushing Ava? Why are they so mean? Why can't they love one another? Then I too play the comparison game and feel even worse. Know that you are not alone!

Sarah said...

I just tell myself that I'm going to beat them. I never actually do, but it feels good to say it.

Nicole said...

I read this out loud and Jessie said "I'm sure Emily didn't do anything mean!"

Clark Family said...

You're not at their friends houses between 4-8. You are dealing with your own bunch. I find myself comparing too, but when it comes down to it I don't think there are two people living together in the whole world, adults and children alike, who don't fight at some point. They must just be really comfortable right? Don't we tend to treat those we love the most the worst sometimes. Anyway, you're great.

Jamie said...

I just wanted to say "amen sister!" I totally hear you on this one! My boys fight like crazy and nothing is more tiring and worrying to me. It is something I'm doing??? Don't worry though, from the time I get to spend with your kids they seem great!

Meghan said...

I seem to remember us doing all of those things, and we turned out okay (atleast mostly). So there must still be hope...

Rebecca said...

Jen, I feel like you are a supermom with all the cool things you do, but your post helped me to think okay, she is normal just like everyone else. This is so my life. I feel guilty that I relish after 830pm! Thinking of you.

Blaire said...

I'm glad I only have one child. JK. But seriously, Jen, I agree with April. Everyone has issues with the kids whether we see it or not. No one has the perfect family.

And it's so true that the people we love the most are the ones we're are mean to. When I look back at fighting with my sisters I thinks, wow, we use to throw baseballs at eachother, yell at eachother, tie eachother up and throw eachother in the closet...really. But then you grow out of the bad behavior and relize that your siblings are your best friends. As a mom, you can only set the example, and teach your children the best you know how to, and hope for the best.